Is a 40 hour job necessarily harder than being a full time mom? My Fiance tends to think so, and therefore we find ourselves in front of this issue often. Now, let me start by saying that I know how hard he works, and I really truly respect him for it; he's up at 4:10 every morning to be out the door by 5am, and at work by 6:30. He works hard all day as an electrician, on his feet and working with his hands, only to come home and (most often) be willing to help out with dinner, dishes and laundry. He is absolutely wonderful, until I chime in and mention that I may be tired from working all day, too.
One hurtful thing he said to me one day was "how hard is it to go to the playground?" And at first, it made me so angry to hear him say this. But then I began to think about it, and have come up with this conclusion: It's not that my job is necessarily harder than his, but in my opinion, requires a lot more energy, which at the end of the day is totally drained.
I do put a lot of this on myself, because I choose to do each and everything I do with my daughter. No, I don't have to take the 45 minute detour to the playground, but it's the only means of exercise I can fit in. Yes, I could let her watch tv or movies back to back so I can relax, but why do that when we can read books, play tag, or color outside with chalk? Being a good mother requires a constant up-beat, happy attitude, no matter what is going on in your life. If something upsets me, I'm not going to talk to my 2 year old about it, or take it out on her by not playing with her because "I'm not in the mood". On these days, come Lyla's bedtime, I'm pretty much ready for bed myself. Having to be happy and the best you can be, when you're feeling anything but, is hard. Simple as that. Zzz...
Eric often thinks its easier for me than for him, when I remind him of the times he's watched Lyla for longer lengths of time, and how tired he was in the end. And often this is true, since I am the mommy, and I am the one she cries for. A hug and kiss from me is what can make things "all bedduh". But who can I give her to when she's throwing a fit in the grocery store? Or throwing her plate full of food off the high chair? I don't have anyone to hand her off to. While Eric watches her at home and counts down the minutes until I return to relieve him, this is not something I have. No complaints, but again, it just creates more exhaustion.
Physically, there's no doubt he works harder in a day than I do most days. But his 40 hours is nothing compared to my 24-7 in my opinion. I don't get weekends off. I'm not out of work by 3. I wake up 1-5 times during the night with my toddler who still wakes often. So, both in our stubborn minds, we both think that we work harder than the other. I just hope we find some balance in allowing each other to be equally exhausted, and have respect for both hard workings jobs.
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